I hate to admit it, but I’m nearly 40 and finding myself thinking about life, death, the past, the present, the future, and all the things I wish I’d done by now. What exactly have I been thinking about to make me want to write about the “midlife crisis” subject?
My grandmother has Alzheimer’s and sometimes it’s really difficult to watch the things she goes through. Her memory of situations vary. Sometimes she can remember exactly what you’ve said yesterday and sometimes she can’t remember the questions she asked just 5 minutes before.
I’ve thought about the woman my grandmother was once and sometimes can’t help, but wonder if it was all for nothing. All the things she’s done, accomplished, worked hard for … does it all even matter? I do understand that I obviously wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for her, but then I think about my own life and wonder how things would be if and when I get to her age.
I also started thinking about my own parents and reminisce on the times they were my age and the things we all used to do back then. I look at my mom, my dad, my brothers, my friends and think about how fast time has flown by.
Lately, I have had at least 5 people mention the words “midlife crisis” to me. So naturally, I had to look it up, just as I do most things. Apparently, a midlife crisis is starting to happen at an earlier age than it used to be for many people and according to a large list of symptoms, I could potentially be having one myself.
7 Signs of a Midlife Crisis
According 7 out of 7 reasons found on the Huffington Post, I’m well into a midlife crisis:
- Panicked about health issues
- Questioning life choices
- Comparing life with other people
- Looking and doing things to stay young
- Sudden urge to reconnect with friends, go to more parties, and have as much fun as possible …
- Wanting more intimate moments
- It’s time to make healthier choices
Lately, I’ve been noticing more health conditions popping up, such as arthritis, hypertension, an unusual amounts of snoring, and many more that I’m a bit too embarrassed to mention. In other words, I’m complaining about the things I used to tease my mom about when I called her “old.”
I’ve been finding myself staring into space a lot more than I ever used to, thinking about the many things that could have been and wondering how much happier I would be if I’d made other choices in my life.
I’ve been doing a lot of comparing lately, wishing I was a lot like more friends … sometimes better or just plain coveting what I wish I coulda, woulda, shoulda have.
I wish I paid attention more in school, gotten better grades, and become a doctor. I wish I’d spent a lot less time getting tanned so I didn’t look as old as I do now. I wish I had at least 5 kids. I wish … the list could just go on! Where’s that Genie when you need him?
I’ve recently given away bags of clothes and have spent almost a ridiculous amount of money trying to restock my wardrobe with newer, more modern looking ones. In addition, I’ve joined the skincare arena and started doing research, writing posts, and even helping companies market their skincare products so I can be well informed about ways to keep myself looking young.
I’ve been wanting to spend more time with my old and new friends and trying to keep up with having a good time as much as I could. I’ve been feeling the need to do so, because somehow I feel more pressured about having time pass without any fun.
I know I’m a mother, but I’ve been playing on the “life shouldn’t stop just because you’re a mother” situation a lot more than I used to. I used to care about my role as a parent for my child and for the onlookers. Now, I only care about the well-being and safety of my child and not so much what my aunts, uncles, and other parents think.
Sometimes, I wonder about why my husband is a lot less intimate than he used to be with me. Yes, I understand … marriage does that to you, but I can’t help thinking of the many possibilities it doesn’t happen. Does he think I’m too fat? Is he grossed out by the gravity situation that’s going on with my body? Am I really nagging him too much? Does he have a younger looking model on the side? What’s really going on?
My occasional green juice and sudden urge to go running or do yoga for 2 to 3 days at a time could help my whole outlook in life as well as perhaps try to give back at least 5 years of my appearance. I go through moments of wanting to lose weight so I decide the best way to do it is to starve myself for 2 to 3 days. Of course that’s not at all effective, but mentally, it helps me to think so.
Many people can go through a midlife crisis simply by doing some of the obvious things, like perhaps things I’ve mentioned above. Sometimes, however, it can result in depression and even life threatening situations.
If you think you’re going through a midlife crisis, don’t be afraid to have an adventure and explore things that could make you happy. Sitting around and wallowing in tears won’t change anything or keep time from passing. It’s just going to keep you sadder than ever and away from doing the things on your midlife crisis wish list. We all have the ability to make things happen for ourselves. We just need to take the positive steps to start doing them.
If you have friends you feel could be going through a similar situation, find a way to support each other. Not only could it strengthen your relationship, but it could be exactly what you both need to get through those troubled times.