Since my husband and I got married at an older than average time of life, we thought we would get past the midlife crisis stage. Marrying at an older, more mature age means we would have done most of what we wanted to do in life, right? … WRONG!
Now I believe it doesn’t matter. Kids can suck the life out of you (in a good and exhausting way), which is why I find myself staying home more than I should.
So if I wasn’t a parent, what would I be doing? Here are 10 things I miss most:
I miss being able to have uninterrupted naps. I can get home from work or wherever I’ve been, kick off my shoes, and just sprawl on the couch without having to do anything else!
With a kid: I have to get my son situated into either a nap, a meal, or comfortable with whatever activity is next. If I’m lucky, I get a few minutes before he either makes a mess somewhere, does something he’s not supposed to be doing, or trying to get my attention.
2. Looking my best
I miss taking long showers and getting out to shave my legs, dry my hair, and the works, without worrying about my son.
Sure I can work at getting myself in a pretty spiffy condition, but it takes a lot more work with a lot less fun than I used to have.
With a kid: I can look my best, but it comes with a price. Sometimes, literally. If I wanted to go to the gym, or get some sanity workout, I would have to either pay someone to watch my son or do exercises at home.
It can be difficult to tell what kind of day you’re going to have sometimes. My son may or may not wake me up in the middle of the night to interrupt my sleep into 3 or 5 hours instead of a good 6 that I usually plan to have.
Sometimes I feel so exhausted that diet and exercise doesn’t even come into play as part of my daily routine. I take what I can to wake up during the day and sometimes dismiss workouts all together, because I simply can’t lift my own arm.
3. Having date night or a night life
I have a few friends who have never been married or have kids and sometimes feel jealous that they can freely wander about as they’d like and not have to worry about anything or anyone else, but themselves.
With a kid: This is pretty obvious. I can again call someone to watch my son, but then I would have to worry about what’s happening as I’m trying to have a good time with my girls. Don’t get me wrong, because I do have those moments at times, but to be absolutely care free is something I DO miss.
4. Having quiet time
There is nothing more relaxing than mindless, quiet moments! One of the reasons meditation is so beneficial for the human body is because it allows us to release stress and toxins with the comfort of peace and quiet.
With a kid: You can’t really have your body completely relaxed, because you know someone will wake up any second and start screaming, crying, or spewing verbal diarrhea on you.
5. Having sexy time anytime and anywhere I want
Sure, when you get married, the sex machine gets a little rusty, but you still like the option of being able to be spontaneous and not have to do it around anyone’s schedule.
With a kid: You’re so tired that it’s not just rust that keeps it all away. It’s the lack of energy and being able to find the right time and sometimes place to get it done. You can’t express yourself a whole lot during the moment either, in case you wake someone up. Sometimes your windows of opportunity are very limited.
Oh! How nice would it all be to have the chance to do all the above anytime, right?
Honestly, I would never trade my son for any of it. With him, my heart feels so complete. And you know what? I believe it’s better to have a happy and fulfilled heart, than an empty and lonely one.