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Afraid to Travel With Your Kids?

My husband and I love to travel. It wasn’t long after our daughter was born that we began to discuss how and where we would travel with her. Getting out and going places with her has opened her eyes–and ours as well–in ways we never expected. So it frustrates me when I hear parents listing all their reasons to not travel with kids.

Gunn.-El-yunque

A popular argument is that small kids won’t remember these trips anyway, so why go? Well, yes, our daughter doesn’t remember trips we took at age 1 or 2 or 3 (even 4 is hazy), but we remember them. We enjoyed the places we went and have great photos and stories to share with her about them. Travel with kids doesn’t always have to be about kids, especially when they’re little.

One blogger on Project Eve wrote a story that was tongue-in-cheek, but her message was clear: Kids are perfectly happy in their backyards so why take them anywhere else? That writer, now a grandma, didn’t like family vacations for reasons many parents don’t: Her kids got messy, she needed to bring a lot of stuff with her and things sometimes went wrong.

Well, kids get messy at home, too. If your 5-year-old is going to spill ice cream down her shirt why not let her do it in Paris? Then, at least you’re in Paris!

The backyard argument is like asking, if kids are happy with pizza and hot dogs, why get them to eat broccoli or salmon or spaghetti carbonara? Why show them classic movies if they’re happy with cartoons? Why introduce a variety of books if they’re happy with Captain Underpants? Because our job as parents is to broaden their horizons and teach them all kinds of cool things.

Sure, things go wrong when you travel, but even that’s OK. Delayed flights, rainy beach vacations, or a destination that isn’t all you hoped are bummers. The bigger your family is the less likely that everyone will agree on the same activities. These kinds of glitches teach you to be flexible, adaptable and patient. You learn to cope with being bored, compromise and take turns. Aren’t these life great skills?

Gunn.versaille

Here is an example: On a beach getaway in Puerto Rico two years ago, we tore our then 5-year-old away from the resort with its pool and waterslides and chicken fingers delivered to your lounge chair. We drove to El Yunque rain forest and at a popular spot began what we thought would be an easy five-minute walk to a waterfall. It turned out to be a good 30-minute walk along hilly, slippery jungle paths (and then back out again). Our daughter, not an enthusiastic walker, spent the hike pretending she was on a Mickey Mouse Club House adventure. She sang songs, collected sticks, consulted an imaginary map and searched the treetops for bad guys.

Afterward I told her I thought she’s handled the hike really well. She answered reproachfully, “Well I didn’t have much choice, did I?” I was taken aback. But then I thought, Okay, she wasn’t where she most wanted to be, but instead of complaining (which she does as well as any kid), she found a way to make it fun. She wouldn’t learn to do that that if we never took her out of her comfort zone (or her backyard).

You can say we have it easy with only one kid—in some ways we do. But Steve Martin, who hosts the Big Family Travel podcast travels with his four kids and Dan Smith who writes the Points With a Crew blog travels with six. Any parent can take inspiration and advice from these intrepid dads and their kids.

One key to enjoying family travel is shifting your expectations and finding the upsides. You won’t ever sleep in if you’re traveling with a toddler, but you’ll have first dibs at the breakfast buffet, get the best chairs at the pool and beat the crowds everywhere. When we visit cities we check out as many playgrounds as we do museums, but we’ve discovered some beautiful parks and cool neighborhoods in pursuit of a good jungle gym.

Bilbo Baggins once warned Frodo, “It’s a dangerous business, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might be swept off to.” For kids and parents alike this can be a wonderful opportunity. So go with it, messy clothes, extra bags and all.

Eileen Gunn

Eileen Gunn

Eileen Gunn is a former financial journalist and mom to a well-traveled 8-year-old. She found the website FamiliesGo!, to give parents the tools they need to plan better vacations more easily and to enjoy their family vacations more. Feel free to follow FamiliesGo! on:
Facebook | Twitter | Google+ | Pinterest

25 comments

  • I tend to avoid traveling with my kids because I have three and they are all young. However, when they are older we are going to be going on some pretty awesome summer vacations.

    • Even with younger kids you can camp overnight, rent a beach or lake house for a week or weekend, or an apartment in a city you want to visit. Just keep it simple and don’t have an ambitious agenda. The earlier you start the better they do. The PointsWithaCrew blog is great inspiration.

  • I totally agree! Kids are messy everywhere, and you always need to bring stuff even for yourself. My now 15 yr old went to Paris, France with me when she was just 13 months old. She had a wonderful time and so did I.

  • I really enjoyed this article! It can definitely be difficult to travel with kids, but I agree that it’s ultimately worth it. I really loved your point about how traveling with large families teaches you how to be patient and adaptable. Hopefully this post will inspire some families to bring their kids along when they travel!

  • …. flexible, adaptable and patient. That’s how I make it through all our family vacations!!! We do the same thing with the parks–many times our “BIG” adventure for the day is done by 3/4 so we head to a local playground…just like we would at home!

  • I remember the family vacations very findky. Even some of those trips, when I was probably 5 or 6 years old. We used to go camping every summer just about even when my twin sisters were around 18 months old.

    I feel guilty for not doing this with my kids. Life circumstances have always managed to creep up on us. We do a few local things when we are able.

    I think it’s good just to connect with family even if it’s a day outing. Head to the park, have a picnic, toss the football, and create memories. The kids really just want to spend quality time together more than big expensive trips. Yes, those are nice but it’s not worth feeling guilty over as a parent.

  • I think it’s wonderful that you travel with your child and I’d encourage more parents to do so. We’ve never gone outside of the US (except Canada), but still visit some amazing places stateside that have made for awesome memories and experiences for the whole family!

  • I traveled wit my son last year, this year we are staying in, but also im glad that his older so is not to difficult to travel with him. Since he can do a lot of things by himself.

  • I agree that children need to experience life and part of that is traveling to different places. They will be better off for it. They will do fine as long as your expectations are that they will do fine.

  • We’ve always traveled with our kids and just dealt with whatever speed bumps we encountered along the way. That’s just like, in my opinion.

  • I don’t mind traveling with my kids. I figure kids are kids everywhere and while I do try to take them to my kid-appropriate places, for the most part I haven’t run into any issues!

  • We take family vacations every year. It may not be easy with 3 kids, but we do it anyway! We are making memories so it doesn’t matter if they get messy, it’s all about having fun.

  • We are in the middle of a year traveling with our kids. We bought a 32′ trailer and are trying to see all 48 contiguous states. It isn’t always easy to travel with kids but I agree, it is worth it!
    Love the pics.
    🙂
    Traci

  • I decided to take my almost 5 year old niece on vacation last month for the first time, not near as bad as I expected 🙂

  • About Author

    Eileen Gunn

    Eileen Gunn

    Eileen Gunn is a former financial journalist and mom to a well-traveled 8-year-old. She found the website FamiliesGo!, to give parents the tools they need to plan better vacations more easily and to enjoy their family vacations more. Feel free to follow FamiliesGo! on:
    Facebook | Twitter | Google+ | Pinterest

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