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Parenting Perspective Before Parenthood

My world had been very different before I had a baby. The freedom! Oh I could do absolutely anything I wanted at anytime. I worked really hard (sometimes too hard) and played really hard too. I didn’t have anyone else to think about except myself.

Parenting Perspective Before Parenthood

I have to admit that I had been one of those people who used to say, “when I become a parent, I will work and still play. I won’t let my kids hold me back from having fun.” Boy, was I naive!

My paranoia evolved when I became a mom. I had no idea that love could be more extreme than anything I’d ever felt before. In fact, I love my son so much that I feel as though any fear I had in the past is outweighed by the feelings I get when he’s sick or even the idea that anything bad could happen to him. Hence my need to rethink about every action I take now before I do anything.

I choose to be a stay-at-home mom because of my own insecurity about not being around for my son during the early stages of his life. NOW I know why many moms did it! I understand! Of course there maybe other reasons, such as child care, especially for parents with multiple children, and more that I’m sure I would find out if I’m ever blessed with more than one child.

In addition to what I thought I could do as a parent before becoming one, I had absolutely no idea why parents fussed so much about children. I didn’t dislike children. I thought they were cute little people, but I really couldn’t see what all the fuss was about. Why do parents talk so much about their children? It was like a nonstop thing with some of the parents I knew. All they did was talk about what their children did all day! It was exhausting to be completely bored listening to stories about kids all day!

Since I’ve had my little boy, all I could do is talk about him! Every day, week, and month, I can’t believe how he advances and is just able to do more as he grows. I am ecstatic that he could understand me now. When I tell my cousin, who’s single and have no children, she looks completely bored, which made me remember that exact feeling! I knew exactly what was going on in her head!

What were your thoughts about parenting before becoming a parent?

Lexie Lane

Lexie Lane is the creator of voiceBoks.com, owner of Social Media Panel, and co-author of the book, The Blogger's Survival Guide Tips and Tricks for Parent Bloggers Wordsmiths and Enthusiasts.

24 comments

  • I used to think, say in grocery stores, why can’t that mother control her kid? Now, I’ve got a kid who says balloon over and over and over and over until he’s screaming for a balloon and all he wants is a balloon and nothing will placate him EXCEPT A BALLOON and why don’t you just give me a balloon balloon balloon balloon, no I don’t want Goldfish, I want a BALLOON!

    And of course I can’t give him said balloon because then he’ll expect the balloon all the time after all the crying and whining. So, now I fully understand why that mother needed to get her freaking shopping done and just tuned out the kid because she knows the only way he’ll be quiet about the balloon is to leave the store and get them out of sight.

    • Oh! Well said! I go through this exact scenario SO MUCH! You can tell when someone’s never been a parent, of course, when the judgmental looks get thrown your way!

  • Once I was lambasted for giving my opinions when I was young, because I didn’t have experience. It really hurt, since I had so much admiration for that person. I understand now why he lashed out at my ignorance, but it made me very patient with those that speak from inexperience. I’m never mean about it, and figure time will teach.

  • My feelings about ‘parenting’ before becoming a parent is -DON’T DO IT! My unmarried sister has done more damage to family than she realizes. She looks at parenting from an ideal perspective which sounds really good, but in reality doesn’t work! I can hardly wait for her to become a MOM! LOL

    • Sometimes you really can’t tell someone. They have to experience it themselves. I can imagine how many opinions she must have with you having 11 and her not having any.

  • I can relate to so much of what you said here. About paranoia, especially. I also remember feeling as if I never realized that it was a twenty four seven “job” staying home. Although you enjoy it, it can really become overwhelming, especially with the fears, insecurities, unknown – everything we experience as parents. But it’s beautiful, something I wouldn’t trade for the world. This brings back many memories of when they were newborns!!

  • I’ve been a parent for so long (23 years) that I don’t even remember what I thought about parenting before I became one. I do know me & my husband (who is now my ex-husband) would get up on Saturday morning and say “let’s go here” or “let’s do this” and there was no one else to worry about. Oddly, I don’t miss those days. I think a mother’s love goes deeper than anyone can understand, unless they are a mother. (Enjoy every minute now, because they grow up real fast. Mine are now 17 & 23).

    Stopping by from VoiceBoks!

    • Hi Laura! I can see that! My son is only 2 and I see how fast he’s growing. Time really does fly when you’re having fun and I think in this case I am with him!

  • Parenting is such a surprise, no matter how prepared you think you are for it. I think the most amazing thing is that it is so much harder and so much easier than you can ever imagine until you become a parent.

    You have to experience parenting to begin to understand the strength of feelings and attachments. There’s no other way to understand it.

    • Yes! It’s easy to talk about it with someone but unless they experience it for themselves, there really are no words to absolutely compliment it! I absolutely LOVE every bit of it.

  • I had much the same ideas about parenting that you did. I thought kids were cute and I knew I wanted to be a mom one day…but I would never be as strict as my parents, or talk about my kids all the time. In fact, I wouldn’t ever ground them! Yeah…those were my naive thoughts before I had kids! lol It’s amazing how much being a mom – a parent changes you.

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